Tag Archives: upcoming events

Safetyfest 2011 is less than a month away!

Promo Poster for Safetyfest 2011 - April/Abril 14-17, 2011

Mark your calendars: CUAV’s second annual Safetyfest is coming, April 14-17!


From CUAV‘s Safetyfest Blog: Safetyfest is a 100% free festival celebration of all the fierce ways queer and trans people in the Bay Area stay safe and strut our stuff. Our communities already have so many of the tools we’ll need to end violence and be truly safe in all the ways we deserve to be–we just need to share them!

It’ll all kick off with a sexy launch party in Downtown Oakland, followed by dozens of amazing free workshops, cultural events, and art and healing activities on both sides of the bay, and wrap up with a hella fun closing party in SF.

The first-ever safetyfest took place in 2010 and was super fabulous beyond our wildest dreams–over 300 people attended! This years festivities will build on last year’s strengths and deepen the impact of what we can do together. We’re bringing back the most popular workshops from last year like self-defense, sexual consent, writing, BDSM, Bay history bike tour, and more, and adding new workshops based on feedback from attendees and other folks in our community. What do you want to see at safetyfest this year? Send your ideas to safetyfest@cuav.org.


Visit www.cuav.org/safetyfest to We need your help to make safetyfest a reality!
, check out the  full calendar, get updates and learn how you can participate! (And, speaking of participation, visit http://www.volunteerspot.com/login/entry/322345634360052045 to learn how you can volunteer with Safetyfest!)
Please also visit the Safetyfest Indiegogo page at http://www.indiegogo.com/safetyfest-2011 and donate, donate, donate! Safetyfest is free to all attendees, and we need your help to make safetyfest a reality! While you’re at the Indiegogo page, make sure to watch the incredible video that CUAV/Safetyfest staff & volunteers put together so that you can learn more about this amazing, revolutionary event and why it’s so necessary for you to be a part of it!

Body Heat Spring 2011 Tour!!

We head out on into the deep deep (ahem) South in less than a month! Can’t wait!

Body Heat: Femme Porn Tour  2011

The fifth installment of Body Heat: The Femme Porn Tour is set to hit the road April 15th with a long-overdue focus on the South East.

Body Heat is a national touring collective of fierce Queer Femme porn/erotic authors, performers, poets, and dancers who offer a sizzling two hour performance, as well as a variety of workshops on sex and gender and erotic writing.

This fifth line-up will feature Body Heat founder and spoken-word performer Kathleen Delaney (Atlanta, GA.), published author and sex-workshop facilitator Jen Cross (San Francisco, CA.), The Femme Show founder & performer Gigi Frost (Boston, MA.), Erotic writer and versatile performer Alex Cafarelli (San Francisco, CA.), and graceful and elegant Burlesque dancer The Lady Ms. Vagina Jenkins (Atlanta, GA.). Special guests include Margaret Cho, Phoenicia Phoenixyz Battle and more!

Along with an arsenal of erotic song, dance, camp, poetry, smut, and prose, the femmes are often joined by special guests such as celebrated sexologists and authors Carol Queen, Diana Cage, and Shar Rednour. Body Heat often welcomes new local performers at various stops along the tour.

Body Heat has garnered such praise as “THE best Femme porn writers in the country,” (Center for Sex Positive Culture, Seattle, WA.) Kathleen Delaney founded the tour in 2007 with the hope of supporting and promoting Queer Femme visibility and desire through their contributions to erotica, the sex industry, the sex-positive movement, and in forming a more complex sexual identity through art and performance.

Body Heat Spring 2011 Tour Dates!

  • Saturday April 16th: The Eyedrum – held @ The Goat Farm, 9pm, 1200 Foster Street, Atlanta, GA. 30318 (special guests Phoenicia Phoenixyz Battle & Margaret Cho)
  • Sunday April 17th: TBA
  • Monday April 18th: Flying Monkey Art Theater, 2211 Seminole Dr SW, # 501, Huntsville, AL.
  • Tuesday April 19th: Little Hamilton Collective, 1318 Little Hamilton Street, Nashville, TN, 7pm
  • Wednesday April 20th: Planet Ida, 904 Vickers Hollow Rd, Dowelltown, TN., 8pm
  • Thursday April 21st, The Get Down, 1045 Haywood Rd, Asheville, NC, 9:30p
  • Friday April 22nd, The Pinhook, 117 West Main Street, Durham, NC, 9pm
  • Saturday April 23rd: Charis Books, 1189 Euclid Avenue, Atlanta, GA workshop + reading/performance; 4pm Afternoon Tea Social (special guest Phoenicia Phoenixyz Battle)
  • Saturday April 23rd: House Party TBA, Atlanta

Hope to see you out on the road! Please come out and say hi!

what’s coming up — and no regrets

It’s a quiet quiet morning here at this new place — the seabreeze has calmed, quieted, and even the trees are still.


Here’s what’s coming up!

Tomorrow, March 10, I’m going to be facilitating a sexy-letter-writing mini workshop at Femina Potens during their Strap Ons and Smut event. Just $15, and you get to write and then learn some strap-on skills with kinky educator & bondage rigger Rain DeGrey! Get your tickets now!

Then, Writing the Flood is on March 19 — if you’ve got some words that have been pushing at you, if you can feel them rumbling around inside your hands, behind your fingers, then it might be time! Come join us and let your writing flow.

And next month: The Body Heat: Queer Femme Porn Tour hits the road again! This time we’re going to be blazing through the Southeast: Atlanta, Nashville, Birmingham — I can’t wait to meet you. Please help us get our kitty going (which gets us to you and makes sure we’re fed)!


Today I’ve got candles on either side of my computer, I’ve got tea that calms and wakes, I’ve got an hour before I have to be at my bus stop.

I am thinking about self-forgiveness, how it’s an ongoing process, how, in fact, maybe it’s an everyday thing, maybe it’s a practice.

What if you forgave yourself everything? Or even one small part? What would your hands feel like after? Your shoulders? Your knees?

Relatedly: I read this poem yesterday: Antilamentation, by Dorianne Laux — Write first, if you’d like, about the above questions. And then let this be your next prompt:


by Dorianne Laux

Regret nothing. Not the cruel novels you read
to the end just to find out who killed the cook, not
the insipid movies that made you cry in the dark,
in spite of your intelligence, your sophistication, not
the lover you left quivering in a hotel parking lot,
the one you beat to the punch line, the door or the one
who left you in your red dress and shoes, the ones
that crimped your toes, don’t regret those.
Not the nights you called god names and cursed
your mother, sunk like a dog in the living room couch,
chewing your nails and crushed by loneliness.
You were meant to inhale those smoky nights
over a bottle of flat beer, to sweep stuck onion rings
across the dirty restaurant floor, to wear the frayed
coat with its loose buttons, its pockets full of struck matches.
You’ve walked those streets a thousand times and still
you end up here. Regret none of it, not one
of the wasted days you wanted to know nothing,
when the lights from the carnival rides
were the only stars you believed in, loving them
for their uselessness, not wanting to be saved.
You’ve traveled this far on the back of every mistake,
ridden in dark-eyed and morose but calm as a house
after the TV set has been pitched out the window.
Harmless as a broken ax. Emptied of expectation.
Relax. Don’t bother remembering any of it. Let’s stop here,
under the lit sign on the corner, and watch all the people walk by.

Thank you thank you thank you.

maintaining creativity and survival

graffiti of vines, painted in white on red brick It was 47 degrees when I turned on the space heater in our office this morning. Thank god we’re moving.


Let’s start the year writing! Here’s what’s coming up: on 1/15, the first Writing the Flood of 2011! Then, on 1/29, come on up to Sacto for a day of erotic writing and fun: Reclaiming our Erotic Story: the Liberatory Potential of Writing Desire.

Visit the links for more information or to register — can’t wait to write with you!


Still learning the ostrich feathers of my own heart, still learning how I grow, how I twist, how tenacious and strong my roots are, what I care for even without conscious awareness.

One of the things I struggle with (and also have been saved by) as a survivor has been living in the present. As in, only in the present. Even still, when I get very stressed, suddenly time itself seems to contract and all I can think about is the very right now: nothing else matters, or even exists. Until quite recently, making a 5-year plan seemed outrageously outlandish to me — how can you plan for a future you don’t see yourself in?

This isn’t about feeling suicidal, it’s something different — something about having to be very very present in the right now, in the this moment, just to put one foot in front of the other, just to maintain.

And these days, I am learning how I don’t maintain anything else — just the present moment. In the Open Exchange magazine (yes, I do read it sometimes — no judgment, blame, shame, or guilt around these parts!), Claudia Six writes about the importance of maintaining relationships. She says that relationships are like plants: they have to be tended and nurtured.

As I was reading, I thought: But I don’t tend to or nurture my plants — or my car, or my body, my car or my relationship(s). I expect it all to just carry on around me.

Claudia Six writes, “[Y]ou don’t wait until you need a root canal to go to the dentist” — and I thought, Actually, I do. She suggests, rather matter-of-factly, that folks don’t wait until there’s a catastrophe before they attend to or maintain the things they care about.

But I do. I wait until there’s a catastrophe. I wait until things are falling apart and have to be replaced. I don’t mend, clean, wash: maintain. What is that about? Do I act like royalty in this way, like my stereotype of the very upper-class, the wealthiest people who just throw away the car with the check engine light on instead of taking it in for regular service and fixing small problems before they grow?

Maintenance requires a larger vision — I mean, a larger view. A wider view. Catastrophe is immediate, and, of course, eminently more familiar. Catastrophe is right now. Maintenance is dealing with what’s possible, thinking ahead, is preserving for the future — this assumes the existence of a future.

It’s hard for me to do this writing: I don’t know another way to be.

Maintenance, as in self-care. What an idea! Clearing before the house is filled with clots of dust bunnies. Weekly tending to the plants. Daily food preparation. 6-month dentist visits, annual dr. visits. These can seem somewhat extreme to me. It ends up that I only want to deal with crises.

What’s the point of taking care of myself — maybe I just end the question there? What’s the point of maintaining what surrounds me, to moving away from living from crisis to crisis? (That sounds like a prompt-type question.)

This is life has looked like: crisis – mobilize resources, man up, make sacrifices of money and time — and then recover — excuse not to do anything, watch tv movies, don’t return phone calls (too busy! too tired!), be unavailable  — build up to the next crisis (because everything’s being left to the side while you recover). It’s totally that old cycle of violence, having to put out fires in all parts of my life over and over again.

What would it meant to be calmer? I can feel myself relaxing into that possibility (breathe into it, actually). Too, it feels more boring: less important, less adrenaline. Important people have to deal with crises! It’s absolutely part of my identity to be too busy, too busy. Too tired, too many jobs: Something to be admired for, and an excuse not to have clothes that fit, an excuse not to have time for deepening relationships, an excuse to be noticed but unavailable. Whew. What does/would it mean to release that part of my identity?

If 2011 is about fully devoting myself to and living a creative life — that means balancing in some organization and maintenance, at least for this one life here. Organize and maintain so that there’s time for spontaneity and play. That means being aware and intentional with money. That means self care comes first. Enough sleep comes first. Being healthy and sane has to come first because I stop functioning otherwise and so do the workshops, which have become my heartbeat.

What can maintenance look like for the different parts of our lives? Let’s make that the prompt — How can maintenance not equal dull? How can maintenance be creative and joyful, life-affirming, even? (Remember: You can write about this for/with any characters you want to learn more about, if you’re working on a fiction piece!)

Thank you for all the ways you maintain — and what you maintain, even without being fully aware of it. Thank you for your writing, your words, your words.

Body Heat: queer femme tour shows! this Friday and Saturday (1/29 and 1/30) in San Francisco!

The Center for Sex and Culture presents

a special SNEAK PREVIEW of BODY HEAT: a femme porn tour — 2010!

Sizzlin’ Fierce Fiery Queer Femme Porn – 2 Nights, 2 Different Shows! ***DO NOT MISS THIS EVENT!!!!!!!***

Friday, January 29 and Saturday, January 30
Cost $10.00 – $15.00 you pick :)
At the Center for Sex & Culture, 1519 Mission Street (between 11th and South Van Ness), San Francisco, CA 94103

Come to the Center for Sex and Culture for the one of these barely-legal Bay Area performances of the Body Heat: Femme Porn Tour. Each night will offer up decadent performances/readings by fierce local queer femme writers, performers and devastritixes!

These will be your only chances to catch Body Heat during this spring!

Both shows begin at 8pm SHARP, $10-$15 (help us fill the kitty for Body Heat’s 2010 cross-country tour!), no one turned away… FMI: http://www.myspace.com/femmeporntour

Friday, January 29th Performers:
Carol Queen
Kathleen Delaney
Jen Cross
Madison Young
Amelia Mae Paradise from Diamond Daggers

Saturday, January 30th Performers:
Shar Rednour
Daphne Gottlieb
Kathleen Delaney
Jen Cross
Alex Cafarelli
Lady Fantastique

Body Heat is a collective of fierce, sassy, irreverent Femme artists setting ablaze performance art communities and smashing Femme stereotypes. Porn, Kink, Smut, Erotica – Body Heat is not reclaiming our sex so much as OWNING it.

We will turn you on.

We will challenge all of your gender, sex, feminist, social, & political boundaries & assumptions.

We will entertain the hell out of you.

Mostly we will leave you panting, begging, dripping for more.



Center for Sex and Culture
1519 Mission St., bet 11th and So Van Ness, San Francisco!

the femmes of the Fall 09 Body Heat East Coast tour, tearing up the pool table in all the wrong ways...
fishnet knees, just before...

San Francisco tonight!

If you’re going to be anywhere near the Mission District tonight, or can get there, you won’t want to miss this reading!

January 14, 2008, 7pm
Achy Obejas & Dorothy Allison

Where: Galería de la Raza, 2857 24th At (at Bryant), San Francisco, CA 94110
Cost: $5-10 donation

Pulitzer prize winner, Achy Obejas (Days of Awe, This Is What Happened in Our Other Life) and Robert Penn Warren Award winner, Dorothy Allison (Trash, Bastard Out of Carolina), start the new year with a special, exclusive reading at Galería de la Raza. Born in Havana, Cuba, Achy Obejas is an award winning journalist, novelist, translator and poet. She is currently the Sor Juana Writer in Residence at DePaul University. Dorothy Allison grew up in Greenville, South Carolina. A self described “working class story teller,” Allison was a finalist for the 1992 National Book Award for her novel Bastard Out of Carolina which won the Ferro Grumley Prize, an ALA Award for Lesbian and Gay Writing, and was made into an award winning movie.

This Wed is the Erotic Reading Circle!

Voted Best of the Bay 2007 by SF Bay Guardian! —
“Best Erotic Resurrection”

with Carol Queen and Jen Cross
Every fourth Wednesday of the month

August circle: 8/27/08, 7:30-9:30pm
At the Center for Sex and Culture
1519 Mission @ 11th, San Francisco

Thanks to all of you who came out to the ERC Anniversary party earlier this month! The amazing readers showcased are representative of the breadth of erotic work shared every month at our Reading Circle! If you come to the CSC on the fourth Wed of the month, you can hobnob with this greatness… and share your own!

Come join readers this coming Wednesday and share your erotic writing & art! Bring something to read or just be part of the appreciative circle of listeners. This is a great place to try out new work (ask for comments if you like), or get more comfortable reading for other people. Longtime writers will bring their latest… newly inspired writers, bring that vignette you scrawled on BART while daydreaming on your way to work! Non-judgmental listening guaranteed, all orientations welcome. Carol Queen and Jen Cross host/facilitate this space dedicated to erotic writers and readers!

Sugg. donation: $5-up sliding scale, but no one turned away for lack of funds.
At The Center for Sex and Culture, 1519 Mission St, between 11th & So. Van Ness

Write to jennifer@writingourselveswhole.org or visit www.centerforsexandculture.org for more information!

This Wednesday, June 18: Thriving Against the Odds!

This is going to be a gorgeous event, folks — come on down to the Dolores Park Cafe and share in the fierceness of survivor voices and strength!

Thriving Against the Odds
A Co-Fundraiser for
CUAV and the SF TransMarch

Celebrating and honoring visibility and safety in our queer and trans communities!

Wednesday, June 18TH 7-10PM
Hosted by the Dolores Park Cafe (corner of 18th and Dolores, San Francisco)
$10-50 Sliding Scale

Community Volunteer Award Winner Ms. Sarah D. as our MC
And performers Jen Cross, Dorian Katz, Jeff Jacobson, Redwolf Painter, Mr. TuffNSTuff, Alex Cafarelli, Celestina Pearl, Connie Champagne, Raffle prizes from Babeland, Writing Ourselves Whole, Good Vibrations and more.

This will be an amazing event! Help support the organizations that support us!

For more for more information visit www.CUAV.org and TransMarch.org

Upcoming events!

Feb is turning out to be a busy month around these parts! Come on down for one or more of these events in San Francisco:

Feb 15: Open Mic at the Exiles!
Keep that V-day energy moving! Gina De Vries and I will be the features at this first ever kinky and erotic open mic sponsored by the Exiles! Open to all Exiles members and guests. 5 min per performer, signup at 7:30, program begins at 8. For more info, visit The Exiles online (http://www.theexiles.org/).

Feb 16: Philosophy/Art Salon: What is Erotic?
Join us for a Socratic dialogue on the question: What makes for erotic art? Philosopher-at-Large Rita Alfonso, Ph.D., will be joined by erotic Writer Jen Cross and visual artist Dorian Katz for a brief show-and-tell followed by philosophical discussion. At Femina Potens, 2199 Market St. at Sanchez, SF. Admission is $10-$25 sliding scale. (www.feminiapotens.org)

Feb 27: Monthly Erotic Reading Circle at the Center for Sex and Culture, 1519 Mission Street, Suite 1, SF. Admission $1-5, no one turned away. (www.centerforsexandculture.org)

March 8: New Erotica Reading at the Center for Sex and Culture.
Join recent and veteran Declaring Our Erotic writers as they share their brave, blistering and brilliant new writing! More details to come: watch this space!

April 3-April 20: Jen joins the Body Heat: Femme Porn Tour (image heavy/prob. not work safe) as we read and riot across these peculiarly united states. Opening stop: Thursday, April 3 at the Center for Sex and Culture. Next stop: San Diego — warn your friends! We’re coming to their town…

And then, of course, the Spring workshops get started!

More info about these events coming soon!