Monthly Archives: February 2011

following the signs

street art: a cut out of a soaring bird, with a human form soaring withinI don’t know if I could be more grateful for the weather we’ve been having.

House hunting is not one of my favorite things to do — it’s about as much fun as looking for a new therapist, with more anxiety, sometimes, at least for me. Every time we have to move, suddenly everything is thrown up into the air — where do we want to live? where could we live? we could live anywhere! And so we scan and consider rentals from Mendocino to Santa Barbara — it’s hard to stop looking at craigslist. And then there are the visits: where will we go look? do we apply here? why did we drive all the way up to Santa Rosa if we really don’t want to live here? but would we have known unless we’d taken that couple hours on one of our few precious weekend days this month?

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Writing the Flood is this Saturday! We’re meeting on the 2nd instead of the 3rd Saturday this month, so that we can have one more meeting in the Flood Building. A few spaces are still available (this will be a smaller group this month) — please let me know if you’d like to join us!
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belong?

graffiti: text "art does belong" and a stencil of a person's face and then the spray-painted words, "australia jails kids"

What is belonging? To what or to whom do you want to belong?

I have this feeling often, of being totally unmoored: without anchor and belonging nowhere and to no one.

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letting hugs in

graffiti of big brown bear holding a sign: free hugsThere’s a lot that I want to write about this morning — like, for instance, the meaning of the word ‘force,’ particularly when it comes to sexual violence and abortion.

But I have a staff meeting to get to.

So I want to just talk for a second about physical contact — are you getting your daily allotment? Even as someone who lives with their partner, there are weeks when I will go days without a hug — too busy, going too fast, no time to stop (and, yes, maybe too scared sometimes, too out of my body, too worried that a hug ‘means’ something else) — and then, no one hugs where I work.

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what they didn’t teach us (and what we learn)

stencil graffiti: i wanna tie u up for a while (with image of a twisted coil of rope)There’s so much going on right now (two impending moves, several workshops, day job, grant prep possibilities — not to mention the book proposals that are sitting off to the side, gathering some dust, too tired and frustrated to keep poking me in the back, trying to get my attention) and yet I sit down in front of the computer and go quiet for a second: what on earth could there be to say?

I’m sad and lonely and sore and grateful, feel held and met and warm, scared and overwhelmed and at peace. Thank goodness I still get to feel.

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