Tag Archives: remembering

dreams and driving and springtime

We are far too busy
to be starkly simple in passion.
We will never dream the intense
wet spring lust of the toads.
– from “Toad dreams,” by Marge Piercy

In my dream, I am preparing for a workshop in an unfamiliar space — I’d been planning to move the group to another place, my office or something, but then I woke up from a nap and the group was meant to begin in under an hour, so I had no choice but to set up where I was — and anyway, that’s where the people were coming to; I’d never mentioned to anyway that I might move to another location; how would they know where to find the group if I moved? So I clean up, set up snacks, and put the poems and other handouts down on the writer’s chairs. Then I go downstairs to wait for folks to arrive — down into a warehouse space, filled with boxes. It’s a small group, only four or five people. One man arrives, and he says he’s changed his mind, thanks anyway, but he doesn’t think he’ll be joining the group. Someone else hears him and tags along out of the warehouse back into the night. I wonder if I’ll have enough people to write with, whether I’ll have to cancel the group after all.

The next Write Whole series begins this evening — I’m not surprised that I’m having this sort of anxiety dream. These are the concerns of facilitators: do we have the space set up right? Are folks going to join us? Will what we offer be enough to keep people in the room?

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the homestead of us

I’m sitting outside in the good spring sun, not even quite 9am and already I’ve rolled up my pajama bottoms and shucked my sweatshirt. The dog is panting with pleasure into the heat, and the birds are filing the spaces between traffic noise and the bell from the nearby school.

Who gets to have a morning like this one? The garden is quiet, shaded until the sun lifts herself higher. Sometimes this is the only morning I want, the only life I want — the sort of life that starts with coffee in the kitchen and a kiss goodbye, continues to notebook and pen and earl words, moves on to weeding, baking, tending, tendering a home. What does it mean to admit this? Continue reading